JUN 28, 2016 @ 09:41 AM

(Photo by Mark Wilson/Getty Images)

Who are the most inspirational people you’ve met and worked with and why?originally appeared on Quora – the knowledge sharing network where compelling questions are answered by people with unique insights.

Answer by Chade-Meng Tan, Co-Chair of Nobel Peace Prize nominated campaign & NYT bestselling author, on Quora.

Without a doubt, the most inspiring person I’ve ever met is His Holiness the Dalai Lama (HHDL). I met him for the first time in November 2005, during his visit to Stanford University. Back then, I was one of the major donors to Stanford for the creation of a Tibetan Studies program, so when the Dalai Lama visited, I was invited as a VIP guest to a luncheon in his honor.

Before meeting him, I was expecting to be disappointed. I had certain expectations of what a holy man should be like, and I was pretty sure HHDL would not be able to meet my standards. I expected him to be an over-hyped bald dude.

It turned out, the Dalai Lama exceeded even my highest expectations. Wow.

The first thing that surprised me was how warm and joyful he was. He was kind to everyone he met. He smiled at people, held their hands, and he laughed easily. He didn’t have any of the airs and pretensions you would expect of someone with Secret Service protection.

The next thing that surprised me come during his lunch talk. During the talk, the subject of Tibet came up. You could tell this was a very painful subject for Tibetans because the Tibetans around us were either weeping or holding back tears, but he talked with such serenity, without a single trace of anger in his voice, and he repeatedly emphasized non-violence, mutual understanding, and his appreciation for the Chinese people. I was sitting right in front of the stage (I was attending as a VIP), so I saw his eyes as he spoke. At that moment, I was convinced that he was the Real Deal. Despite all the pain he must have experienced in his life, this man shows no sign of anger, hatred or bitterness. I was completely awed.

The next day, I was further awed by how intelligent he is. I was watching his dialog with neuroscientists on stage. Here he was on stage surrounded by prominent scholars, and he held his own among them very well. He asked very intelligent questions and made very insightful points. After a while, one begins to suspect that this laughing bald guy, who spent most of the time whispering with his interpreter, was the smartest person on stage.

The most amazing moment for me came when HHDL was responding to a question about compassion and suffering. Referring to an earlier presentation by Bill Mobley which showed that similar parts of the brain light up when a subject experiences pain versus when he empathizes with somebody else in pain, His Holiness raised a major issue that nobody else had thought of. Interrupting his interpreter, he explained in his broken English that there are at least 2 types of compassion, one for people close to oneself (which he called “limited compassion”), and one for strangers (which he called “genuine compassion”). Both are qualitatively different, and hence need to be studied separately. If the brain patterns for both are the same, “Then I feel the brain is very foolish”. Everybody laughed. Bill Mobley was so impressed he commented, “This is one of those experiences where you really understand how that incisive thinking completely defines a 20-year research program”.

As I got to know him better over the years, I realized my initial impression was indeed based on the real Dalai Lama. He is in private the same guy you see in public. He doesn’t put up an act.

In any case, after meeting the Dalai Lama, I told myself that when I grow up, I want to be just like him. Except I want to have hair. And sex. That celibacy thing just doesn’t work for me, sorry.

(This picture below is taken in March 2016. It speaks a thousand words.)

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